Introduction
We’ve all seen it – the cat that waits by the door every day for their favorite person to come home from work. As soon as that person walks in, the cat is rubbing against their legs, purring loudly, and begging to be picked up and cuddled. The bond between some cats and their chosen humans can be incredibly strong. But why do cats pick a favorite person in the first place? And what factors determine who the lucky “chosen one” will be? This article will explore how and why cats form bonds with specific people, and the signs that show a cat has picked its person.
Cats Bond Through Scent
A cat’s sense of smell is extremely powerful and plays a major role in how cats form bonds. A cat’s olfactory system, which includes the nose, vomeronasal organ, and brain, is highly sensitive and can detect pheromones and other chemical signals that humans can’t smell.
These scents allow cats to gather a wealth of information about other animals and people. According to research, cats can detect pheromones signaling fear, arousal, identity, and territory marking from other cats and animals [1]. They can also detect human pheromones through scent glands on the hands and body.
Cats tend to bond most strongly with people whose scents make them feel safe and comfortable. Kittens imprint on the scents of their mother and littermates. As adults, they recognize these familiar scents when meeting other cats. With people, cats are soothed by the scent of their owners which signals caregiving, food, and positive associations.
Cats may avoid or act aggressively towards people with scents that trigger fear or stress. Perfumes, soaps, clothing textures and other environmental factors introduce new scents that can cause anxiety. Being conscious of how scents affect a cat can help strengthen the human-cat bond.
Cats Bond with People Who Feed Them
Cats naturally form strong attachments to the people who feed them. Food is a powerful motivator and reinforcement for cat behavior. According to a CNN article, cats bond with their owners through associating them with pleasurable experiences like getting fed.
Feeding time is an opportunity for bonding and trust to develop between a cat and a particular caregiver. When the same person regularly feeds the cat, the cat comes to rely on that individual and likely shows affection or rubs against their legs at mealtime. The cat associates that person with the positive experience of getting food. Treats and special tidbits also help reinforce this bond.
For example, giving a cat a little piece of chicken when preparing dinner or doling out treats when coming home from work encourages the cat to keep coming to that person expecting delicious food. The cat is likely to show preference and fondness for whoever consistently feeds them tasty morsels.
Cats Bond with People Who Play with Them
Play time is an essential way for cats to form strong bonds with their human companions. When humans initiate play sessions using toys, games, and interactive play, it satisfies a cat’s natural instinct to stalk, chase, and pounce. This predatory behavior released through play leads to several benefits that strengthen the human-cat relationship.
According to The Paw Spa, playing with your cat is “the best possible way to build up a bond” as cats become more attached to humans who play with them frequently (source). Play provides mental stimulation, physical activity, and allows cats to release pent-up energy. A cat that has had adequate playtime is more likely to be calm, relaxed, and content in your presence.
Cats also form positive associations between play and their human companion. As explained by The Ministry of Cat, engaging in play “provides mental and physical stimulation” for cats while enabling bonding to take place through this shared experience (source). When you play with your cat using interactive toys like wands and laser pointers, your cat sees you as a source of entertainment and outlet for their natural hunting behaviors.
Overall, frequent playtime leads to increased trust, attachment, and affection from cats towards the humans they get to play with. Setting aside time for daily play sessions using a variety of toys is an excellent way to become the person your cat wants to spend time with.
Cats Bond with People Who Pet Them
Petting and positive physical touch is a major way cats form bonds with humans. When a cat is petted, it releases oxytocin, also known as the “love hormone.” Oxytocin is released in both the cat’s and human’s brain when they interact through petting and touch (Johnson et al., 2021). This helps create a sense of trust and affection between cat and human.
Research shows the more time spent petting and playing with a cat, the stronger the bond will become. In one study, women experienced higher oxytocin levels after petting and interacting with their own cat compared to an unfamiliar cat. This shows cats and humans can build a unique bond through positive touch and physical affection (Johnson et al., 2021).
Tactile interaction like petting, brushing, and light massage are calming for cats. A cat that regularly solicits petting from a particular person sees that person as a source of comfort. Over time, this leads to a strong attachment bond. Cats are particular about who they allow to pet them, so when a cat repeatedly seeks out petting from someone, it’s a sign of trust and bonding.
Cats Bond with People They Trust
Building trust between cats and their human companions takes time, patience, and calm interactions. Forcing interactions or moving too quickly can actually break trust and damage the bonding process. Instead, letting the cat move at their own pace and get comfortable is key.
Cats that have been abused, neglected, or abandoned may start off very distrustful of humans. Remaining calm, predictable, and letting the cat approach on their terms helps them learn that this is a safe person they can trust. Things like sitting quietly while the cat explores, offering treats, and providing a consistent daily routine demonstrate the human is not a threat. Over time, as trust builds through these calm interactions, a bond will begin to form.
Establishing trust includes respecting when a cat indicates they need space. Learning the cat’s subtle body language signals and responding accordingly strengthens the bond. Forcing interactions against the cat’s will actually diminishes trust. Letting the cat set the pace allows trust and eventually a close companionship to develop between cat and human.
Kittens Bond Strongly with People
Kittens have a crucial socialization period between 2 and 7 weeks of age when they form strong bonds with humans. During this time, kittens are very receptive to positive interactions and exposures that will shape their temperament and behavior as adult cats. Frequent gentle handling, petting, talking, and playtime help kittens become comfortable with their human caretakers.
According to the ASPCA, the most significant socialization for kittens happens with their mother and littermates in the first 2 months. But the primary socialization period with people peaks at 3-7 weeks when kittens are receptive to forming attachments. Without positive human contact at this stage, kittens can become fearful of humans and develop problematic behaviors later on.
Exposing kittens to a variety of sights, sounds, scents, and textures during this period also helps them adapt well to new environments. Gentle handling of their paws, ears, mouth, and body accustoms them to being touched by humans. Kittens that receive frequent affectionate interaction with people during the first 2 months typically develop into friendly, confident cats. Consistent daily interaction is key for bonding kittens with their new families.
According to the Banfield Pet Hospital, the more time caretakers spend holding, petting, talking to, and playing with kittens during this impressionable phase, the stronger the bond will become. Kittens that lack sufficient human contact early on are more likely to be timid, aloof, or skittish as adult cats. But with patience and care, even undersocialized kittens can form positive connections later in life.
Cats Bond with People They Feel Safe With
Cats tend to bond with people who make them feel safe and secure. Providing a sense of stability is key for helping cats form attachments. When a cat feels protected in your home and trusts you to take care of them, they are more likely to bond with you. Cats that have been abused or neglected in the past may take longer to develop trust, but being patient and letting them adapt at their own pace is important. Giving them a safe space, keeping a calm environment, and letting them come to you on their own terms helps them open up over time. Actions like regular feeding, gentle petting if they want it, keeping their litter box clean, and making sure they have access to water and toys reinforces you are someone they can rely on to meet their needs. As they become more comfortable, they will seek out your company and show signs of affection. The sense of safety allows the bond to gradually strengthen.
Signs a Cat Has Bonded
There are many behaviors cats exhibit that indicate they have formed a strong bond with a person. Here are some of the most common signs a cat is attached to someone:
- Purring – Cats purr when they are content and comfortable around someone. Frequent purring in a person’s presence is a sign of affection.
- Head-butting and rubbing – Cats have scent glands on their heads, cheeks, and tails. When a cat rubs against you, it is mixing its scent with yours and marking you as familiar.
- Kneading – Similar to kittens kneading their mother to stimulate milk, adult cats continue this motion on preferred humans when feeling safe and content.
- Grooming – Cat kisses and licking are signs of bonding, especially when the cat grooms areas you can’t easily reach like the back of your head or arm.
- Slow blinking – Also called a cat kiss, slow eye blinking shows a cat is relaxed and trusts you.
- Exposing belly – When a cat rolls on its back to expose its belly, it is demonstrating trust and comfort with you.
- Bringing gifts – From birds and mice to toys or household items, bringing “gifts” is a cat’s way to teach you hunting skills and provide for you.
- Chirping – Some cats vocalize excitement at seeing their favorite person through happy chirping sounds.
- Following you – If your cat regularly follows you around the house, it is showing a strong attachment.
These signs of affection indicate your cat is bonded to and comfortable with you. A cat that exhibits many of these behaviors has likely imprinted on your as their human of choice.
Conclusion
In summary, cats can form strong bonds with people for a variety of reasons. Cats are initially drawn to people through their scent. They bond with those who feed, play with, and pet them regularly. Cats also form attachments to people they feel they can trust and who make them feel safe and secure. Kittens in particular quickly bond with humans during their crucial early development phase.
There are clear signs when a cat has bonded strongly with a person, such as seeking proximity, displaying affection, and becoming distressed when separated. An example is a cat that always sits on one particular person’s lap at the end of a long day or meows at their bedroom door in the morning for attention. This shows the cat has likely bonded very closely with that individual.