What is catfishing?
Catfishing is when someone creates a fake online identity, usually utilizing social media, to deceive people. Catfishers make elaborate fake profiles with photos of attractive people (that aren’t actually them) and fabricate life stories and personalities. They use these false personas to form online relationships, build trust, and eventually exploit people emotionally or financially.
According to statistics, 18% of internet users between 16-24 have been catfished in 2021. The United States accounts for a staggering 62% of all catfishing cases worldwide. Catfishing scams cost an average of $132.5 million per quarter in 2022, an 11.2% increase from 2021.[1][2] Alaska has the highest rate of catfishing per capita in the U.S., with victims there losing $1 million to these scams in 2018.[3]
Recognizing the Signs
There are several red flags that may indicate you are being catfished. Some of the most common signs include:
Use of fake or inconsistent photos – The person may send photos that seem too professional, are inconsistent in appearance, or reverse image searches show they are stock photos or belong to someone else (Signs of Catfishing).
Refusal to video chat – They may make excuses for why they can’t video chat, even just briefly (10 signs you’re being catfished).
Making excuses to avoid meeting in person – They may claim they want to meet but then always cancel or postpone due to elaborate excuses and stories.
Asking for money/favors – Requesting money, gifts, or favors early on before establishing trust is a red flag (Catfished Meaning).
Having a direct conversation
If you suspect someone of catfishing, it’s important to have an honest and direct conversation with them. Ask questions about any inconsistencies you’ve noticed between what they’ve told you and what you’ve found out. For example, “I saw on your Facebook that you live in a different city than you told me – can you explain that?” Or “The photos you’ve sent me don’t match up with your profile pictures – who are the people in those photos?”
Gauge their reaction carefully when confronting them – genuine confusion or surprise may be a sign they’ve simply made a mistake, while excessive defensiveness, anger, or new excuses are red flags. Request concrete proof of identity such as a photo ID, video chat, or hearing their voice on a phone call. A catfisher will typically have trouble providing anything credible. Make it clear that without proof, you cannot continue communicating.
Don’t accept vague answers or promises of future proof – insist on verifiable facts immediately. If they cannot or will not substantiate their identity, you have confirmation that this person has been catfishing you. Some may become upset or threatening when exposed – stand firm in requiring the truth, but disengage quickly if you feel unsafe.
Conducting a Reverse Image Search
A reverse image search is one of the most effective ways to uncover whether someone is using fake or stolen photos in their online profiles. This search allows you to take a profile picture or photo sent to you and see if it appears elsewhere online.
Reverse image searches work by allowing you to upload or input the URL of an image. The search engine will then scan the web for matching or similar images. Some popular free tools you can use include Google Images, TinEye, and Yandex.
There are a few red flags to look out for in the search results. If the image appears on multiple social media profiles with different names, it likely indicates a fake account using a stock or stolen photo. Images posted on content sites or used professionally also suggest the person is not who they claim to be. And if no matching results come up at all, it could mean the image was fabricated.
While not definitive proof on its own, a reverse image search can reveal inconsistencies and provide vital clues in determining if you are really talking to the person in the photos.
Looking up phone numbers and addresses
You can use Spokeo and Whitepages to look up the phone numbers and addresses provided by the suspected catfish. These sites aggregate public records to provide background information on people.
Enter the phone number or address into one of these sites’ search bars to see if it’s tied to a real person and location. If the details don’t lead back to anyone, or lead to a different name/location than claimed, this is a major red flag for catfishing.
Checking if the information lines up with a real identity can help uncover when someone is falsifying their details. It’s an important way to verify if you’re actually talking to the person they claim to be.
Asking for a live video chat
One of the best ways to confirm someone’s identity and avoid being catfished is to insist on a live video chat. This allows you to see them in real time and get a sense of whether they are being truthful in their interactions with you.
According to metro.co.uk, many catfishers will make excuses to avoid a video call, so pay close attention to their reactions if they seem reluctant. They may claim their camera is broken or that they have a poor internet connection. However, most smartphones these days have functioning cameras and video call capabilities.
While some sophisticated scammers may try to use pre-recorded videos or deepfake technology, this is quite rare. Insist on live interaction during the video chat so you can confirm it’s a real person. If they make excessive excuses or refuse to video chat, it’s likely you are being catfished.
Being wary of sob stories
Catfishers often use exaggerated or fabricated sob stories to gain trust and sympathy from their victims. According to this article, catfishers may lie about having a terminal illness, experiencing trauma or abuse, or undergoing other hardships to make the victim feel bad for them. The goal is to manipulate the victim’s emotions so they are more invested in the relationship and willing to provide financial assistance or emotional support.
These tactics prey on people’s natural tendency to feel empathy for others in difficult situations. However, these stories are simply a facade created by the catfisher to further their deception. It’s important to be wary when someone you only know online starts sharing shocking details about their life very quickly. The stories are often exaggerated in an effort to bypass the usual gradual building of trust in a new relationship. While some details may be true, the catfisher uses these nuggets of truth to string together an overall fabricated narrative.
If you suspect someone may be attempting to manipulate you with stories designed invoke sympathy, don’t ignore your gut feeling. Politely express your concerns and pay attention to how they respond. An honest person will appreciate your sincerity, while a catfisher may become defensive or upset. Proceed cautiously, limit how much personal information you share, and try to verify details independently if possible. With a healthy skepticism and open communication, you can avoid being emotionally manipulated by an insincere catfisher.
Reporting fake profiles
If you discover someone is using fake photos or information to misrepresent themselves, you can report their profile on various platforms:
On Facebook, you can report a fake profile by going to the profile, clicking on the three dots in the top right corner, selecting “Find Support or Report Profile”, and then choosing “Pretending to be Someone”. Provide details on why you believe the profile is fake.
For Instagram, tap the three dots above a post, story highlight, or profile bio, select “Report”, and then choose “Pretending to be someone”. Add any additional information to help Instagram confirm it’s a fake account.
On dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge, you can report a profile within the app for impersonation or misrepresentation. Each app has a reporting process to flag suspicious accounts.
The site Social Catfish also allows you to search for and report fake profiles across social media. Submitting details to them can help get fraudulent accounts removed.
Getting fake profiles taken down prevents the impersonators from deceiving more people. It also sends a message that their deceptive behavior is unacceptable.
Cutting off contact
It’s important to cease all contact with a catfisher once you’ve identified them as such. Continuing communication enables further manipulation and prevents you from moving on. According to the Wikihow article on ending catfishing relationships (https://www.wikihow.com/End-a-Catfish-Relationship), you should block the catfisher on all platforms to sever contact completely. This prevents them from emotionally manipulating you or trying to cover their tracks. While it may be difficult, cutting contact is essential to protect yourself and stop the catfishing.
Seeking Support
Being catfished can take an emotional toll. Confiding in trusted friends and family members can provide much-needed emotional support. Talking through the situation helps process feelings of hurt, anger, shame, or isolation. Loved ones can offer reassurance that the catfishing victim is not to blame.
In some cases, the psychological effects of catfishing may warrant seeking professional counseling. A therapist can help work through feelings of trauma or self-blame. Joining a support group with others who have gone through similar catfishing experiences can also help. Support groups provide a judgement-free space to share stories and advice for moving forward after catfishing.[1]